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Memories are like a luke-warm hot chocolate…
It’s a warm morning. Seated outside a café in a small resort with your arms and head draped across a table, the wind whispers and the birds sing only sweet songs. It’s days like these that convince me memories are both sweet and sour. Beautiful like the sweet melody of a violin as you enjoy every ray of light that hits your skin, and the sound of small children laughing lifts your heart. There are no beginnings or ends. There appears to be no direction other than the one you’re going in, and your mind is ever able to remember a feeling of weightlessness in the beauty of simplicity. You’re sitting and listening to a song that reminds you of your ex, the only thing you allow yourself to remember is a brief moment where, in third person, you watch the two of you laugh. There is nothing in that moment other than the joy the both of you share, and even though you know the story ends as you look back, the two of you do not know or even think about the final words in such a beautiful chapter. No matter how hard you convince yourself that it was all a lie, the truth of the matter is that it was once the happiest moment in your life and your mind will forever refuse to see otherwise. When you look back your eyes fill with tears and every song seems to lyrically narrate that small second of joy that keeps playing over and over. Memories are beautiful, but when just memories, are sometimes the most painful things that we have to experience. The knowledge that such a moment happened, causes a stirring in our hearts. But reality doesn’t get much colder the moment you realise that you will never get it back. Like a heartstoppingly beautiful painting on the wall, or a piece of broken, sentimental pottery that you found on your first date with your partner. These thoughts are always there, but when we really take in what it is, or what it was, words don’t seem to do any of the feelings that occur justice. We can only look back and hope that such wonderful times will happen again. #Memories #Kenya #Boyfriend #Girlfriend #Text #...
… No Adelaide. No.
Casually finding out that one of the people I care about got pushed into a wall today by Adelaide dwellers… I feel like destroying the human race. … HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!?! RIDDLE ME THAT SOCIETY!
Emotional Vent :/ haha … soz
Those awkward, painful, but precious moments. When the person you care about is both in love with you and in love with somebody else. It causes great pain to turn away, because your mind knows with every cell of it’s being, that you are going to walk away from this hurt. But also there is great pain in believing, believing because no matter what is said, a small fragment of their heart belongs to you. Believing because you want to feel hope while that fragment is still yours. Believing because right now, believing, is an option and when they no longer feel that way towards you, you’ll be left feeling exactly how you would have felt if you had turned away at the beginning. And isn’t it better to prolong that loss. That heartache. Or is it worse knowing what is to come in your head while your heart fights desperately for something that is only causing it pain. Am I a fool for believing love wins in the end? Am I just victim to a childhood of fairytales and magic? Truth of the matter is I know not. In regards to the matters of my heart I know nothing. This pain that burns could be a result of a love that I feel, but having been in love with two people one cannot help but feel betrayed by ones own heart and therefore not trust this burning to be anything desirable, nor anything truthful. Instead it all feels like a game. A game my physical must reluctantly play. While my emotions run wild trying to search for a truth that doesn’t seem to exist, throwing me between joy and pain, loss and gain, crazy and insane. Yes I do think it is my heart that is to blame. Only the heart of a child why does it have to be burdened by something as corrosive as love. In hopes for the outcome I do desire I hold onto this hope that my heart seems to constantly produce, and abundantly so! And as I am being thrown back and forth hopefully I’ll learn to understand the storm, so my fall only feels like a rocking of the boat, we’ll all pray, as we wait, that I do not capsize. Please heart. Do not let me down. |
Love, Music, Madness This is my heart
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